We Don't Have to Win

Sunday’s sermon, “Go the Second Mile” (Matthew 5:38–42), reminded us that Kingdom people resist evil, not through retaliation, but through redemptive generosity that overcomes evil with good. As the sermon closed, we were challenged to “go the second mile” — a call that deserves careful reflection. Even as the message was being preached, my mind was drawn to a story I had heard a few months earlier from a dear brother in Christ - a story that tied in so well to the sermon. 

This story is not a headline-making account of faith tested by extraordinary evil. It is quiet and humbling, lived out in the ordinary rhythms of work and life—where the rubber of faith often meets the road.

The story begins with a dear brother in Christ who had grown up in a Christian home and in the church, yet had rejected the Lord, walking in open rebellion. By the time Jeff and I sat down with him for a shared meal, he had been walking with the Lord for several months—still a baby Christian, but one hungry to grow.

During our conversation, he shared a situation he had recently faced at work. After transferring to a different location within his company, he was temporarily sent back to his former workplace to cover a staff shortage. It didn’t take long for conflict to arise. His previous boss had always been difficult, and their relationship had been marked by regular tension. And this tension carried real implications for his reputation and credibility.

But something was different now. With the transforming work of Christ alive in his life, he was able to humbly engage with her.

In this conflict, she accused him of bookkeeping errors he was confident he had not made and could easily disprove. But as he sat across from her, her brokenness and lostness overwhelmed him. As she lashed out, he chose not to retaliate, not to escalate the situation, or defend himself. Instead, he extended grace and absorbed the cost — laying down his right to be proven right or to protect his reputation.

When I asked how he could respond this way, he said simply, “She needed a win that day more than I did.” In that moment, he understood something many of us struggle to live out: he really didn’t need to win.

His response, and the reason behind it, was clearly shaped by the Gospel and stood as evidence of God’s grace at work in his life. His decision wasn’t due to passivity or fear. It was a Spirit-led choice to absorb a cost for love’s sake.

I think we all know what it’s like to fight to be understood, to defend our reputations and to vindicate ourselves. On hearing his response, I was brought to tears. Not only was I grateful for the privilege of watching the Lord actively reshape his life, I was convicted about my own. 

His story brought Philippians 2: 3-4 to mind, a passage where we are called to do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit but, in humility, to consider others better than ourselves. That command is enough to stop us in our tracks, rubbing up against our fleshly tendencies. 

But as the passage goes on, the intensity increases, as Paul calls the church to have the mind of Christ Jesus and then gives us the humbling picture of Jesus’ life on this earth.

“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” ‭‭Philippians‬ ‭2‬:‭5‬-‭8‬ 

Paul sets Jesus, not only as our Savior, but as our example. Though fully God, He didn’t cling to His power or status. Instead, He chose to humble Himself, living, as a servant, willingly obedient to God to the point of death on a cross.  

The fact that He did this for our redemption should humble and convict us, and then lead us to awestruck worship of our Lord.

And the story doesn’t end there. We know that on the third day, He rose again, proving victorious over sin and even death itself. Through all this, He has been exalted and a day is coming when every knee will bow before Him and every tongue will confess that He is Lord.

And let’s remember that my friend was right—he didn’t need the win that day with his boss.

And we don’t need the win either.

For this reason: Christ has already won.

And by His grace, those who bow before Christ before that day are heirs with Him. His victory has secured our eternal destiny—a future in which we will rule and reign with Him in the new heaven and new earth.

So let’s make it our practice to remember our inheritance in Christ and that, because we have been given everything, we are free to live generously—extending grace and forgiveness, giving our time and resources, and offering kindness, encouragement, and more.

In Christ, our identity is secure. Our value is found in Him—not in any win or loss this world can hand us.

And that is what frees us to go the second mile—because He has already won.